This article points to the dilemma we all face (it is addressing the United Methodist Church, but the situation is synonymous to that in the BSA, LDS and other institutions who hold the right to discriminate as a higher virtue): Echoes of Jim Crow in the United Methodist Church.
The comments are worth the read as well.
How we face the "echoes of Jim Crow laws" is key--and it is on each of us to find the justifiable and defensible place for ourselves, in front of our peers, and before the judgment of the generations to come.
For my own involvement in these institutions, I strive always for this: To work constantly and directly towards a fully-inclusive future, and otherwise to facilitate an "underground railroad" providing a route to safety and freedom for the oppressed and for those forced to oppress if they remain.
There is a test to know when we are collaborating with the status quo, or taking advantage of a closeted or privileged position: If after every participation in the discriminating organization we come away thinking perhaps the words spoken or actions taken on that specific day are likely to bring about the desired institutional change, or to lead to your own expulsion from the organization, that is when we know we have stepped into the uncertainty and taken the risks required for change. It doesn't require a majority of us to live dangerously, and to take the leap of faith, but it does require some of us.
When enough of us predicate our continued participation in this way the change becomes inevitable, and the discrimination will end.
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